In May
2014 I did a ten day buddy/companion program with a guest from the USA. A
retreat to deepen, discover more and to focus on yourself. Part of her program
was finding her life mission.
She had
several very responsible jobs in international projects and worked at many
countries all over the world.
Three
weeks ago, after nearly five years, I got an email again from her with a
request to have a Skype contact. We did last February 22nd. A little
puzzle because of 12 hours’ time difference and we managed.
I felt
happy because obviously her insights of the program were still very much alive.
Also a little bit excited to hear her story from the last five years and the
reason for her contact.
After
saying hello again the first thing in her new introduction she said was: “The
cancer I got was a gift for me.”
This
opening of our conversation for me felt a bit as a shock. I did not get a long
time to think about it because she continued that she is a survivor of a one and a half year severe cancer.
She told me in her
opinion one does not simply become ill. She discovered the journey into illness
that embraces the depths of emptiness. She has asked herself many times, what
created this sense of emptiness and she told me she found out. It was not the
illness. It was not the pain. It was not fear of the unknown. The
emptiness for her was the lack of living her defined life mission.
When she first defined
her mission during the program, five years ago, she could touch the idea but could
not visualize the actual mission. She could not see how and was not ready yet
to implement it because she was afraid of failure and did not believe that
happiness was within her grasp.
Her cancer brought her
back on track and now she is ready to begin (or maybe I need to say to
continue) this chapter of her life’s mission. She can visualize it. She knows
where she is going, and better yet, she understands that if she does not get
there, the journey itself will nourish her soul.
She was very excited
and wanted to share her plan with me. Just as a mirror. And she will do it. She
has a three month sabbatical leave to work it out and is sure she will find her
new way. I will follow it from a distance.
The contact and our
conversation with her brought me back to my own story. The accident I got
driving through The Westerschelde Tunnel in The Netherlands, end of 2010, got
me ‘out of service’ for over thirteen months. A struggle, a fight to come back ‘on
the same stage’ and I did not succeed. At that moment I felt it as failure and
did not believe happiness was within my grasp either.
Now I say it was the
best thing that could have happened to me. It brought me back on the track of
my mission and of LIVING my life. There was no other possibility then to face
what life was all about. What really is important in my life and how I could
use my life in an even better way to share and grow.
Sometimes, especially
when we are involved in hard situations, we do not see any light on the end of the
tunnel of our life. But some tunnels are curving. A colorful outcome,
like the tree on this picture, can be waiting for us.
Having my own
experiences and having worked with many guests from all different parts of the
world I know that if you not follow your life mission, it will make you ill. What
is life about for you?
No need to get an
illness or accident to follow and share your uniqueness in life. To learn and
be yourself. No need to be someone else. Everybody else is already taken…
Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)
Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.
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