Status, position, successful? Often a temporary ‘hot air’ show.

Many people have the idea that they are not good at anything, that they are not able to be as successful as other people. They cannot be and feel happy; they envy the accomplishments and social standing of others while regarding themselves as failures if they do not have the same level of worldly success. They are suffering of an inferiority complex, from low self-esteem. They do not see the unique very good seeds they already have in themselves. And not knowing them they cannot develop them. They are only looking and striving for more, for being better. Actually for making themselves different than they really are.

First of all, if you make a mistake you are not a failure. You are learning. And about success… lots of time it is just an outside show. More and more I get this understanding working with many international successful people (on the outside).

It is just an illusion to think you are worthless. You are superior! Everybody is superior because you are unique. There is only one you of you and this you of you has the possibility, actually it’s the quest of your life, to grow and serve with the potential you have inside. NOT with other things and NOT in a way your environment tells you to do, but to fill the gap the world is waiting for. For you! Only to use your unique sets of talents and share them with the world. Doing this does not even feel as working. It is flow. You have already the master inside. Just show your superiority and use it being yourself.

We look at social status, positions and success of other people but do not even know what’s going on in this people’s live, what’s their underwater profile. Lots of times it is just a temporary ‘hot air’ show. In my life so far I have seen enough and I discover more and more it is a fake show in relation to, again temporary, power. I even knew people / managers who gave themselves a ‘higher’ social status by the amount of employees they had in relation to other directors. Some people gave them selves a higher status out of fear (narcissism) or in their way of ruling (Machiavelli).

Social status can be determined by your own achievements. Actually in the best and engaged way to show, work with and serve with your unique available talent-DNA. In this way is shows respect by others. This has nothing to do with being successful but with being yourself.

The other way is getting status by being placed in a position. That does not say that you already, or ever will get, respect. You have to earn it.

A last way of getting status is being placed in the stratification system by your inherited position (ascribed status). Like for example our King Willem Alexander of The Netherlands and our King Bhumibol of Thailand who both, because of their acting and connection with people and country, receive great respect. They are not working to get this respect. They are (or at least in the circumstances they are in) try to be their selves.

Status, position and success are all temporary. And when you are really hard working to be better and more successful than others there is never an end. There is always somebody else who is ‘better’. You will never come to an end. And the saddest part of all, you forget to give real attention to your own seeds. To water them so the master can be visible and touchable.

Many people who look successful show it in material things. A bigger house (more mortgage to pay and have to work harder), a higher ‘status’ brand of car (to help the outside world you are really happy and successful), designer cloths, even plastic / cosmetic / aesthetic surgery. And getting more and more successful there is less and less time to keep the life – work balance. And having the status at a certain moment you even need camera systems to guard your properties or sometimes even private guard. Discovering your success actually kidnapped your freedom and put you in a jail of stress, publicity, not being able to be your true self anymore.

And people who feel inferior think this is success. This is something to go for? This is the goal to be (un)happy?

When people having status resign in most cases immediately their status and power is gone. Actually this shows it is not a personal thing and status is temporary. The real personal thing, that does not fade away, is if respect from other people remains even without their position.

We are always busy getting ‘better’ than others. Because of this we miss ourselves and we miss living life a lot.

“The tragedy of life is not so much about what men suffer but what they miss.”

Thomas Carlyle (1795 – 1881)

Do not compare yourself with others who look to be more happy or successful. If you look more deeply within and get in touch with the wholesome seeds in you, you will be able to overcome your feelings of unworthiness and manifest your true nature. Your true master.

Are you doing the right thing? Do not waste your lifetime. How many more years are you are going to live to? Just be your natural self. Do not believe the ‘hot air’ show of status, position and success of others. 

And maybe a last additional thought. My mother used to say: "We are all the same. Everybody need to go to the toilet and maybe the people with 'status' use even cheaper toilet paper than you. And everybody has to take a shower and being naked be aware you are most of the time much more beautiful than the person you think is 'better'. So be yourself and be happy with that." 

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight: “Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

www.captijninsight.com

captijninsight@gmail.com