Friday, July 28, 2017

The story of the (cherry blossom) tree. Mirror for a more balanced lifestyle with purpose.

Introduction:
The Buddha was inspired by nature. There is a lot to learn from nature. In our running life more and more we are disconnected with fauna. The present connection and identity for most people now a days is technology. You cannot fetishize the technology. It’s just a tool. It’s not the purpose. The purpose is always changing in the off-line mode. What is there to learn from nature.

This story, I sometimes use during my early morning meditation classes, is mend to share some insights. You can use it just to read and to contemplate or to use it as a means for (guided) meditation.

In this story I make use of the image of a cherry blossom tree (Tree of life) but also just a normal tree that connects with you is a wonderful and useful image.

In Japan, cherry blossoms, next to other meanings, also symbolize the impermanence of life, which is a major theme in Buddhism (everything is temporary and everything is interconnected). The cherry-blossom tree is known for its short but brilliant blooming season, a natural process that metaphorically describes human life.

The brilliance, fragility and transience of life
Tied to the Buddhist themes of mortality, mindfulness and living in the present, Japanese cherry blossoms are a timeless metaphor for human existence. Blooming season is powerful, glorious and intoxicating, but tragically short-lived — a visual reminder that our lives, too, are fleeting.

Why don’t we marvel at our own passing time on earth with the same joy and passion? Why do we neglect to revel in life when it can end at any moment. Or in the grace surrounding us everywhere like possible: our family, friends, a stranger’s smile, a child’s laugh, new flavors on our plate or the scent of green grass? It is time, cherry blossoms remind us, to pay attention.

In short:
The Japanese use the short life of a cherry blossom before it is scattered by the wind and rain to symbolize the cycle of life, and they use it as a reminder to celebrate beauty. The Buddhist consider the opening of a cherry blossom as a symbol of wisdom because it is like the mind blooming into enlightenment. They also consider the cherry blossom as a reminder to exist in the present moment before life fades away.

Note in relation to meditation:
# (Standing) If you want to use this story as a meditation you can do it standing in nature or in your garden or terrace and just connect with any tree that is asking your attention. 
# (Sitting down). If you want to use this story as a meditation and nature around you is not available, then just sit down at a place you feel at peace and at rest with yourself. A place where for a while you will not be disturbed.

The story of the (cherry blossom) tree

I invite you to connect with a tree in nature or, if nature is not available now, imagine a Cherry Blossom tree standing in a landscape.

The first thing to recognize is that a tree does not make any effort to be attractive. The tree is just available in the landscape. Undisturbed by other trees, animals, plants, houses or human beings. Undisturbed by what his or her environment thinks of it. The tree is just effortless being. Resting, breathing, showing its uniqueness. Flexible, rooted, not hiding for storms, rain or when the baking sun beats down. Just accepting. Not trying to be anything else than just his/her uniqueness, this tree. Showing his or her uniqueness in beauty. Yes beauty because its attracting you.
A tree is showing us the ongoing cycle of life. The ongoing process of growing and renewal. It shows us how to be and how to stay rooted. Is shows us the only simple things needed. Like water, soil, fertilizer, sun and air. It is the mirror of taking and giving and of letting go. It shows us that even having maybe many life cycles to make, also for a tree finally there will be an end. The tree shows us the seasons of life and the seasons in natural growth and renewal even in the process of getting older. The tree obeys nature.

Do you live in harmony with the seasons of your life? Do you recognize the beauty of all seasons? Many people live contradictory. They do not obey nature. Their rhythm is opposite from nature.
Winter for instance is a period of rest, of making up balance and of preparing for the new four seasons to come. Summer is the period to flourish and to be in optimal strength.

If you think of your live how do you live? Very often, without even being aware, we live opposite. In summertime there is more light of the sun. More energy. We go to the beach to rest. In winter we have more darkness, longer nights to serve us and so the natural quest and offer to have more rest.
In winter we use electricity to create more light so we can make longer working hours. We eat higher energetic food and, especially around European Christmas time and end of the year we reach the climax of our busy-ness as if life does not start up again the next year.

So winter is the time to recharge, to rest, to connect with the source and meaning of your life. To make up your balance sheet, build up wisdom, and to prepare for the next cycle to come. 

In Spring the tree starts to make one step forwards in growth again. The new and energetic juice stream helps the tree to start its new life cycle. The buds of the leafs, waiting already from the end of autumn many months ago, unfold soft and in a bright and sunny green shining ‘Sprouting Spring color’. And with this process the first blossoms appear. Opening to attract the right insects to help creating the fruit and the seeds for the next generation to come.
After only a short period of a couple of weeks. The blossoms drop their petals. The first giving back to nature again. Blown by the wind they are the first new fertilizers for the soil.

In summer the leaves turn darker in color. They turn into adults. Stronger, harder. The tree is strong and in optimum state for the breathing (photosynthesis) process. Giving back oxygen for animals and human beings to breath.

When we mirror this to our lives we can ask ourselves some questions.
First of all we can ask ourselves why we continuously want to shine. It is not possible to always shine. It’s only marketing that helps you to believe it is. Actually what you do is you force and punish your body if you do not obey nature like a tree. You do not obey nature, you do not respect nature, you do not accept and respect the beauty of yourself in the ongoing growing and transforming process.
The second question you can ask yourself is; “what do I give back to the world? Am I only taking? What do I give?”

In Autumn every leaf turns into a flower. In many ways you can see autumn as harvest time. Time to give and time to let go. Creating space for something new to become.
First of all a tree shows us during this period there is an effortless and painless way to let go. Accepting change. It is necessary to grow. If you do not accept change there will be no growth. Without any effort the tree, just at the right moment drops its leafs. Sometimes with some help of the wind. The leafs are the fertilizers for the soil needed for the next generation to start-up there first of many possible life cycles.

Then the tree drops the fruit, the seeds. The fruit, the harvest to eat or to multiply as a guarantee (new) life has to go on. In nature it is just a question where the seeds fall down and how big the multiplying of life will be. That’s why most of the time and growing at the right place and with the right circumstances the tree produces lots of seeds and/or fruits.

Again we can ask ourselves what is our harvest, how do we give back. Do we really take care for the next generation to come. Different than in nature we have the opportunity to plant our ‘seeds’ at the most wonderful and for the specific seed best places. Are we willing to do this? Is this connected with the purpose of our life?

Are we connected with nature? It’s just a matter of connecting, of contemplation.

Being as a tree and obeying nature…

Living a more balanced lifestyle with our unique purpose.


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

captijninsight@gmail.com





Friday, July 21, 2017

Right habitat. Feeling the comfort and connection of paradise village life.

During a private retreat I worked with a guest from Russia. With her family she is based in a world capital city because of the work of her husband.

The first day she expressed already two times in the morning her wonderful remembrances of her youth, living in as small village with only about two thousand inhabitants somewhere in Russia near the border with Japan. This time, walking with me through our (much smaller) village to our village temple, she called it 'Paradise'. It made her happy and longing for that time she was a young girl.

And she is not the only one. Many people who come to our 'one stop destination for healthy living', to work on or to connect with (holistic) health call our place and environment paradise. They like it so much but all have an excuse not to live in a healthy place so for them not the right habitat. 
During her Mandarin study, my daughter had to study at a university of Being. Actually she could not stay because she got all kind of physical problems caused by pollution. People pay a tremendous amount of money for a small apartment or house. And they stay... It's the place to be to earn lots of money. They still live the (more and more) lie that money makes you happy. So they earn a lot of money, pay a very high price for their 'living', make themselves sick and need to spend that money to make themselves healthy again. Going on believing in the idea (their general excuse) there is no other option. It's a must to run life...

What a difference our paradise. 
Everybody knows me here, everybody says hello to me and want to connect. It feels home, no it is. Not because people want to know everything about you but because you cooperate in village life and try to be friendly to the people living and working there. Cows sometimes blocking the road. No traffic jams. Sounds from nature you still can hear.
It is me who has to adapt, it's me who need to respect. I am 'the intruder' in this village, in this culture. People are willing to connect.

Even the school-bus driver, who every morning comes to our village to pick up the children for the primary school in the next (main) village, just waves his hand. The children in the back of the car scream and laugh loud; "Hello, good morning!".

I am the bold "Farang" (man from abroad) with the Thai dog on his three wheel scooter, walking in white cloth with our guests through the village and everybody knows me. I even have an USB stick with English Karaoke songs to join the Thai parties in the village and perform on stage. For me it's normal, so common. No stress, not wanting to be better, not wanting to achieve more, just and only living. 

How different it was in my former life and the places where I lived. There were just only a couple of people, for instance next door neighbors, who said hello. Most of the people only live for themselves. Not to much face-to-face connection. A feeling of fear to connect. Sometimes even anxiety. If you say hello to a stranger you do not get an answer or the person looks at you with eyes: "Do you need something from me?". 

In our habitual running life more and more we are lost. Missing the real interaction. Following what we think our environment, our family, our economy wants us to do. Believing marketing to make us temporary happy. 

Happy to live in my village. Yes, many people (I am one of them) call it paradise and... for me it is. 

Just take some time to contemplate on your habitat (living and working area). Does it help you to LIVE life completely? Do not think in threats and general excuses but in opportunities. Isn't your health the number one in your life? 


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 


captijninsight@gmail.com




Friday, July 14, 2017

Hard to make a decision in or about your life? You are never alone. Consult your masters in life!

For three weeks no blog. Just because I could not find the time. I got an unexpected visit of my two children because of my birthday and we got a lot of guests. 

Today a new blog about the power and message Masters in your life.



Masters in Life

The voices of others shall always stay in 'our house', but they should not take over.
You live there and it's your voice that may sound there loud and clear.
That's the voice you can trust, one who knows what is best for you,
that understands your rhythm and knows your destination.

(Patty Harpenau)

Every human knows his personal teachers / masters in life. A very small 'select' group that is there to your best interest and which you trust like none other. People you put only therefore naturally on a pedestal. Although they may already be deceased or not personally nearby with you, you can still consult, reflect and/or deliberate with them. Asking questions or, from your experiences even literally hear your Master(s)’s answer in a certain issue in your mind.

Although they, like the above sentences by Patty Harpenau indicate, should not take over our will power, they can sincerely help you with all kinds of questions. You might call that woolly and if so then simply do not use it. Wasted opportunity I would like to say. Your Master in your life is (or your Masters are) unbiased, sincere in the best for you and knowing you in many cases better than your own pocket. You really can build and trust on Masters in Life, your teachers.

Dealing with a question in your personal life? Hard to find or get an answer how to deal, where to go or what to do? I offer you a simple exercise.

Here, on this place where you are right now, I want to ask you to take a moment to stand still and take time for your Masters in life. Please follow the next instructions:

  • Who is / are your Masters in Life (already passed away and/or still alive)? (call them by name, write down their names).
  • Find a silent place and hide for disturbances for a while. If you want you can burn a candle as an invitation for your masters to join you for a while.
  • Invite your masters to accompany you in a personal meeting and imagine them sitting around a table. You are the chairman/woman.
  • Just explain what’s going on in your life and what makes it hard for you to decide.
  • Drop your question now on the table and give some time for your masters in life to make up their mind or to connect with the thing you are dealing with. 
  • Now, after a short period of silence, one by one watch your masters in their eyes and invite them to respond or reflect.
  • Listen carefully (sometimes it will take a while before response comes.). 
  • Now, after listening to the response, make up your own mind (again) to make a decision. Keep in mind the voices in your head you heard were not your voices. Still you have to make your OWN decision. Do not be shy to accept change in life. If you do not accept change you do not accept personal growth.

Know that master(s)/teacher(s), like no other are willing to care for YOU and can and want to be your guide.


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 




Friday, June 23, 2017

The message of Silence

Silence. Do you nowadays still recognize silence? Is there any place you still can find silence? What does silence bring you?

Really, all around us is noise. If it's quiet then we just make noise. It seems silence makes us feel crazy. What makes us so afraid of silence? Sound seems a wanted distraction we need to not connect with ourselves. Silence connects you with the war that’s often going on within yourself. A war between ratio and feeling/emotion. A war encouraged by personal (past) experiences and suffering. A war stimulated by worrying in relation to fear for the unknown, the future.

My first real experience with silence was when I stayed for a week in a Benedictine monastery (St. Benedict's mountain in Vaals, The Netherlands). Actually, and certainly with my experiences I had at that moment about self-development and spirituality, an inexplicable experience. I felt secluded and at the same time it made me happy. Immediately I got in contact with deeper life questions. With fear, grief and also with joy and gratitude. In that monastery I had the mystical experience that my hand suddenly felt caught by something bigger than me, or someone I could not see, when I was writing about my feeling. Something or someone took over my hand and began to write down the answers on a question I had about my son. I still have that hand written paper somewhere and described that experience in a diary that I kept for many years after our decision to get divorced for my children.

At about a one hour and fifteen minutes’ drive of the place where I live, there is a huge cave in a mountain (Bua Tong Cave). I regularly visit that place with personal guests. It is definitely not (yet) a tourist attraction. You can enter the ground floor of that cave or (together with monks) go into the catacomb. Also in this cave you can experience total silence and to be honest, it’s still a very strange phenomenon. Certainly if you have had the real experience feeling/connecting with real silence.

Silence makes listening a deeper and more intense sensation. You become much more sensitive for the art of listening. You expand your consciousness. And not only your consciousness in relation to listening. You widen the sensation of feeling, tasting, watching and smelling as well. All your senses will be more open and more sensitive. Some people call it a deeper connection with your authenticity.

Sound has turned into a ‘tool’ to run away from a deeper connection with yourself. To escape yourself. Silence, on the contrary, brings you in touch with yourself.

Silence is not the absence of something. It is your awareness, open your mind, for everything that is available for you.

It is quite common, getting older, you deal and engage with deeper (life)questions in your life. That you are looking for answers and directions to go. Life, after all, is a continuous expedition in relation to growth, personal development and sharing your uniqueness.
The strange thing is that we are used always to search for those answers and directions to go in the outside world. Silence does not work with that but, on the contrary, brings you in connection with your inner world. There, and nowhere else, all the answers on this type of questions are already available and waiting for you. You only need to discover them (discover/uncover = to remove the cover because those answers have been covered so far). It’s just to take the cover, the lit, the dust, of. You do not need to look for and will not find the real answers on this questions in that outside world.

In relation to your uniqueness, your way of life/life style, your passion, you already since birth, have everything you need inside to grow and share as it’s best meant to be for you. Because you are not aware of this (yet), you try to find and follow a different road, acting as your own personal helmsman telling him the direction you want. However, your life often has a something different ‘treasure’ for you. Something you might not want yet, but after all it will work out to be the best choice for your growth.

The message of silence is to connect you with your inner source. To create space to anticipate instead of abrupt react. There is nothing to ask. You only will receive. To be willing to receive that what’s waiting for you (and you are ready to receive) in the understanding that this several times is not what you want (yet). To surrender to life in full confidence that your life can not go wrong. You only have to live it…


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 




Friday, June 16, 2017

Newsletters and magazines have lost their value. They are wasting time, effort and money…

Last week in my blog I memorized already that I "unsubscribed" all kind of newsletters and receiving (or buying) magazines. No longer they support me in my personal process of growth, focus on myself, learning myself better, and studying more. All things I try to do to live my life fuller and more in connection.

A long time ago already during all kinds of training's and even during a so-called 'Business Bootcamp' I was told at least to be on social media, have a blog, write and publish at least once in your life a book, and keep your relations and customers “warm” with sending them a regular newsletter. All to keep your company, your business or your organization in the spotlights.

More and more people, acting as flocks, followed this advice. And yes, I also was one of them (and still for a part I follow). I once wrote a book (not as a response to one of this calls but out of an inner call to leave something that can be shared in length of years). Stupid me I did not write that book in English. And for the same reason of inner calling, I continue with publishing my blog because I think there is something to share and possible to learn and they get a lot of response.

Last week I was invited to work a couple of times at the Four Seasons Resort. A wonderful place to be. I am always early to have some time to adapt, prepare and enjoy before my class starts. Twice, in the waiting area, I took a magazine in my hands, and yes, about health. It took me a while before I came across the first small article in those magazines about health. First I really got 10 pages with marketing about watches, diamond rings, luxury cars, perfume, houses with swimming pool, etc. Not what the title of the magazine promised I thought.
At the place where I live and work a short time ago we had photo shooting sessions. All for a Chinese magazine on travel and health. A publisher showed me three copies of the magazine. Fantastic pictures, beautiful quality paper and also here 6 pages to turn before the actual magazine started. Turning the pages I asked him at a certain moment when his magazine started. He had to laugh. Yes sir, otherwise the message we want to bring will be unprofitable ... !? What about too expensive? Aren’t we thinking in a strange kind of vicious circle? We have to pay for this magazine if we want to have it and also people who buy a car, perfume, make-up, etc.. pay for it. And then we think, because of this, we get it for a ‘cheaper’ price…

These magazines offer less and less value in relation to what the name of the magazine tries to believe you, you will get. It’s all about marketing. Even a Dutch mindfulness magazine called “Happinez”, has become an expensive periodical nearly only filled with marketing / advertisement. The actual content is not even 25%. Sorry but the truth (for me). A waste of money, time and trees (paper).

Only short and already a very long time ago I published newsletters. Tribes of people had and still have the guts to go on with it. The newsletters I got by post on paper had some value. They brought in the recycling some money for a charity foundation. The digital ones disappeared even faster by pushing a button on the computer and did not even bring any money for this foundation.

There is a lot of work to be done in setting up and developing a newsletter, and perhaps the great added value is that you, as a compiler, are aware and connected with everything that’s going on in  your life, your company, your business, your organization, or whatsoever. Just because you have to think about it writing it down. You are arranging.

Because of an overkill on newsletters you - wanted or unwanted - receive and the lack of time you have or want to take reading them, you can ask yourself if they have any left value.

Your newsletter is unique. Yes, that's right because you or your organization you write about is unique.
However, among those newsletters that are so digitally sent now, that uniqueness is not seen any longer. You only and easy press the button ‘delete’ to refer the newsletter that took so much effort to prepare to the digital recycle bin.

And, I am sorry to say, more and more this happened by me and, it’s just my opinion, I think there are many more people who do exactly the same. I do not have or take the time to read them, lots of them I never asked for, most of them do not have any value for me. They do not care me. Being more and more ‘buried’ under the “newsletter phenomenon” I unsubscribed nearly all of them. And yes, less and less emails. Creating rest to connect with things I really want to connect with.

In short, the overkill of newsletters from everything and everyone and the overkill in marketing in magazines for me destroyed the value of them. I ask myself what their contribution is in improving communication and understanding. For me it's just a matter of time and creating time and space by unsubscribing and not buying any longer.
The ‘news value’ I want to have I can find on the internet.

Step by step I really find and have more time to live life again without spending time on newsletters and magazines.


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 




Friday, June 9, 2017

As if I had said farewell to my life. On the contrary. Without (social) media I have just returned to even more LIVING life again.

Last May 3rd, in advance, I shared on social media that I would stop with my ‘memberships’ of the (social) media starting May 20th. That stopping is less easy than you think. To leave Facebook for instance took only technically two weeks. And that's already enough sign/message to me. Marketing clings like a tiger on your pants and to get rid of it ... not easy. I will also say goodbye to all kinds of digital and written newsletters and magazines soon. Within a couple of weeks I will write a blog about my mainspring to stop with them as well within a couple of weeks.

A good acquaintance I already know for a very long time sent me a few days after I quit with my (social) media an email with the text:

"Who 10 years ago had ever dared to assume that social media would be so influential in our lives?
That people say farewell and live a good new life to you when you tell them in advance that you will no longer be boundless available for our Holinesses Facebook, Twitter, etc .. You almost got the the status of hero. You choose to sail and connect with the big sea of life. The others stay behind on the quay…They lost you .... Goodbye Frans…

Funny because actually what has really changed. You're still the one you are. Anyone who's really in touch with you, knows how to reach you, just like before the Facebook era."

Reading this message and looking deeper into it, a big grin showed on my face. How well all the intent of my friends on the social media and being thankful and grateful for all the response ... for me there is a deep truth in his message.

I received praise. People who actually also wanted to quit with social media but could not do it (yet) because of all kind of general excuses, circumstances and… addiction. People who thanked me (thank you as well otherwise for your thanks) for all insights and pictures about my present life I posted. People who wished me luck and an even more happy life. Friends who granted me success and strength on my further life path. Even a serious attempt to ‘keep Frans on social media’.

And looking back on all the responses now, it still creates a kind of feeling as I said farewell to my life. Something that another acquaintance nearly literally wrote to me.

Nothing is less true to me. For a short period of time I even had a lot of time left (about 1,5 till 2 hours a day). This time now has been completed ‘consumed’ with real connecting and deepening. Indeed, that was my purpose and I got it. I LIVE life even more and more intense than ever. Unrestrictedly available and accessible ...? No, not anymore. I'm turning into the master of my life again and in what I really want. Connection with life, with myself, my kids, my girlfriend, my animals, nature, the people who get on my way or cross my path for a while. Rest, engagement, and more peace of mind. Being there, being available being in contact as it is meant to be. Less distortion and disturbance from any form of media with all kind of information that helps me to worry about things I cannot really change. Offering me, by marketing, all kind of things I have to buy to make me (temporary) happy. Showing me how ‘rich’ and ‘happy’ life can be. Wishing so many people; “May your life someday be as awesome as you pretend it is on social media”.

My love now is with the smaller world around me, with reclaiming face-to-face conversation, with growing by sharing my uniqueness with others (and they with me). Being just as ‘appealing’ on the inside as I am on the outside (nothing to hide the truth). Celebrating my life by moving on to bigger and better things. Living the philosophy to always stay true to my personal set of values. To enjoy even more spending my time in the outdoors on my own, with love ones or with our international guests surrounded by nature.

Blissful to choose for a deeper lifestyle and yes, there still is a long journey to discover and learn. A lifelong as long I do not run out of my time.


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 
captijninsight@gmail.com

Friday, June 2, 2017

“I go back to my Concrete Jungle again…” Don't play a game with your health!

This morning as usual I walked with my dog through the forest. Every day I try to visit at random different places. In the place where I was today, I had not been around for about a week. I almost did not recognize the path. After the first a bit heavy rainfall, the trees and bushes are exploding new, fresh, blissfully smelling green leafs.

A few days ago I said farewell to guests again. Increasingly, short, very intense and often emotional contacts become my life. Two of those guests thanked me and told me it was time for them to return to ‘the real world’. I've written a blog about this ‘the real world’ theme before. As if my world would not be a real world. One of those guests told me that after a week of nice experiences, connecting with herself and connecting with nature, she returned to the concrete jungle again. Where are you going? I asked her, not knowing this term so she explained. Do you recognize??? What is your jungle for happy (healthy) LIVING?

Many of our guests who visit the resort literally escape for a while their lifestyle and living environment. From more and more major cities, you can now book direct flights to Chiang Mai International Airport. Cities like Bangkok, Chengdu, Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur, Macau, Beijing, Beijing, Seoul, Shanghai, Shenzhen and, for example, Singapore to name a few. And with just a simple stopover, the connection with much more large concrete jungles (cities) is even much bigger.

During her study in Beijing, my daughter regularly showed me the huge amounts of smog and far unhealthy air pollution, common in this city. It literally made her sick. Many of our guests who live there tell me exactly the same. The street scene? Running especially busy people only connected with their mobile devices (as far you could see through the smog). Why do you want to ‘live’ an unhealthy life like this? Business Cities, Commerce, Gambling ... It's all about money.

The old principle that makes you believe that money makes life easier and ‘really’ more happy. Whether you get sick or not...
It takes you away of the idea that there is only one goal in life (called LIVING) and that health in living a sustainable life is the main asset. Do not play a game with your health for money and getting a shorter (unhealthy) life. Not stress, not pollution, not running, not distraction, but connection with the holistic approach. For that you need a right and healthy habitat.

LIVING life is living your uniqueness. To respond to your inner call (whatever the world thinks of it). To share and to grow. That’s the meaning of LIVING life. Making your live valuable. So not only the focus on making money (and destroying your health). Not even for a short period of your life because you are young and strong enough.

A week 'different' “I-experience” helps you to make clear what living your life really is all about and especially why ... Many people don't care about their health and take health for granted in the race for more money, more desires, (even) more "I". They forget that it's all temporary and they cannot take can not take anything at their last day... They, you, we, own nothing...

What do you choose in relation to your happiness and health? That concrete jungle full of running and digital connections, or the jungle in which you can authenticate connect with yourself, your supporting habitat and others beings to become happier?

Easier said than done? Don’t you have your responsibilities?
These therefore already are the first general excuses that toxify you. Let go and start LIVING whatever other people think of it. Take responsibility for yourself.

Too bad to earn a lot of money to spend after all to all kinds of specialists to make you healthy again. Your run out of time! Do not forget to live and especially to enjoy life.

It's later than you think!


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 
captijninsight@gmail.com

Friday, May 26, 2017

The effect of our always wrong perceptions. Ask yourself: “Am I sure?” and sleep better.

We act on the basis of wrong perceptions nearly all the time. Our thoughts are related to three things.
  1. Things we really see, hear, feel, smell or taste. 
  2. Things we only create in our mind, our illusions. 
  3. Things in between reality and illusions.
Our response has to do with our life experiences and programming. We respond out of a kind of toolbox of 51 mental factors. You can see as a kind of main 'response emotions'. Only 11 of them are wholesome. 26 unwholesome and 14 neutral. In our lives actually we are used to mainly respond out of the 26 unwholesome emotions.
When we see a person walking in the street, or a new colleague at our work often our first response in our mind is negative. We immediately start with labeling. The man for instance is too fat, his or her clothes are overdone, the lipstick of the woman is too red, too much make-up, etc.. Our response, over all, is more unwholesome, negative than positive, contributing. Without even being aware we are trained to do this.

Things we really see, hear, smell, taste or feel are real for us. Most of the time they are part of a bigger reality we are not aware of yet. So our perceptions are made out of that what we see and often are not totally right or totally complete. When you look at a beautiful sunset, you may be quite sure that you are seeing the sun as it is in that moment. A scientist will tell you that the image of the sun that you see is the image of the sun from eight minutes ago. Sunlight takes eight minutes to reach the earth from such a long distance.

Illusions are not true. Our mind does not know or understand the difference between true or not true information. It starts creating all kind of solutions basically to help us to stay safe and to survive. The same is happening with things in between ‘reality’ and illusion.

An example. A man, still in love with his wife, whose wife for a couple of weeks is at work abroad had a short Skype-call with her at the moment she seemed to be in a restaurant. He discovered she was very happy having a dinner with a stranger, another man. Her husband did not wanted to disturb her dinner so told her he would call her back the next day. During the evening and night he created all kind of stories in his mind. About their relationship, what she was doing the rest of that evening and night, what made her so happy having dinner with that man, etc.. The next day he heard from his wife it was the husband of her female colleague. They were so kind to invite her for dinner at that restaurant and she did not have the time to tell her husband because of his short call. At the moment he called her, her colleague just was paying the bill at the counter of the restaurant.

Our perceptions habitually are wrong. Our responses are unwholesome. Together they even accumulate our feeling of suffering. Consuming lots of energy, make us feel miserable, not trusting ourselves anymore, and even creating insomnia.

We have to be very careful with our perceptions, otherwise we will feel pain. A helpful thing is to make a note and put it on the mirror in the bathroom with: “Are you sure?” and: “Even if you are sure, check again!”

Often we have hurt ourselves, we created a hell for ourselves and our beloved ones because of our perceptions. Are you sure of your perception?
When you are angry, and you feel pain, try to take some distance and inspect (look deeply) in the role of third person, observer, the content, the nature of your perceptions. Your programming, your reflections, your reality (instead of the reality), your response (out of personal hurt, jealousy or whatever else).

If you are capable of removing or changing the wrong perception, peace and happiness will be restored in you, and you will be able to love and connect in a better and right way with other people again.



Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 
captijninsight@gmail.com


Friday, May 19, 2017

Without mud no existence, let alone growth.

I still like to translate very simple stories that I hear or read here in Thailand into personal insight. With my blog I want to share them.

Last week I read a story about a tree that was sick in a large garden. A specialist was even hired to give advice about, - and to possible heal - , this tree. In the Netherlands we call it a tree-surgeon. The tree got all the attention. And yes, it survived. Many other trees and plants in the garden unfortunately died.

What was, no actually what is, going on? By taking care of the 'patient' the other trees and plants in the garden were given (too) little attention and passed away.

But Frans, what has this to do with mud?
Actually, it's very simple. To give a Lotus flower a chance of existence and growth, mud is needed. It’s a basic need. Mud in Buddhism is the metaphor for the world (our personal world) of suffering and worrying. And first of all you need that mud, that suffering, to become who and what you are.

Where and what are the disturbances in growth? They all have to do with our clinging, not letting go of our thoughts and desires, and with paying too much attention only about how to get out of our mud. We are too much connected with our ‘sick trees’ in our life.

The layman Vimalakirti once said: “Because the world is sick, I am sick. Because people are worrying, I have to worry.”. A lot of times our choice is to have pity with other people or with situations in their lives or in the world. With that we even think we help other people showing our empathy and deeper connection with them. In fact, facing and connecting with their worrying and suffering, we are getting deeper and deeper into our own mud by being busy getting out of that same mud. The ocean of suffering and insecurities is immense. And with being busy with coming out of our own mud we do not help anyone. Showing and feeling pity or sorry does not help anyone. You only make more 'victims'.
Being at work in the ocean of suffering, we forget to turn around and see that the ocean can only exist because there is also land. So to see, or trust, and look forward there is land as well.

All that (unnecessary) suffering, worrying and sometimes even our insomnia, is only an effect. And if there is an effect, there is also a cause. This cause often has to do with the way we have been programmed by others. A programming that created our lifestyle (the way we personally respond to situations in our lives). There is nothing wrong with showing compassion, but showing compassion helps you to stay in balance and to be able to see there is black and white in all things and in all circumstances.

Even if you are carrying a lot of sorrow and sadness, there are countless things around you that really can offer you the opportunity to be more happy. However, you refuse to do so and to pay attention to them. Don’t wait until you have no more suffering before allowing yourself to be happy.

To become a beautiful lotus flower first you need mud. In order to be able to exist and grow into something beautiful, you also need mud in your life. Physical, mental, emotional, spiritual and not to forget environmental (energy takers and energy givers) ‘mud’. If you really take the time to look deeper so far you, wanted or unwanted, needed all of them to make you the person you are now.

If you're not happy with it, it's just and only in your hands to do something about it. Not in the hands of somebody or something else. So stop complaining. It’s a matter of shift and change of attention and NOT to overlook all the healthy trees and plants in your garden, despite the one sick tree. Everything you give attention grows…

Even while you have pain in your heart, you can enjoy the many wonders of life. A beautiful sunrise or sunset, a happy playful child or animal. To suffer is not enough. Don’t be imprisoned by your suffering.

Experienced hunger, you know that having food is a miracle. If you have suffered from the cold you know the preciousness of warmth. When you have suffered, you know how to appreciate the elements of paradise that are present.

Don’t ignore your suffering, but don’t forget to enjoy the wonders of life, for your sake and for the benefit of many other beings, as well.  

Negative experiences at first sight, have the ability to help us to find our path of deliverance and salvation in live. You most of the times only have to turn around.

Other people do not let you suffer, you only do that yourself. Mud in your life, and of course still not at all always attractive at first sight, is needed to live your existence more deeply and to enjoy those things that are also available for you to grow and share as a wonderful Lotus flower.


Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 
captijninsight@gmail.com