Friday, June 23, 2017

The message of Silence

Silence. Do you nowadays still recognize silence? Is there any place you still can find silence? What does silence bring you?

Really, all around us is noise. If it's quiet then we just make noise. It seems silence makes us feel crazy. What makes us so afraid of silence? Sound seems a wanted distraction we need to not connect with ourselves. Silence connects you with the war that’s often going on within yourself. A war between ratio and feeling/emotion. A war encouraged by personal (past) experiences and suffering. A war stimulated by worrying in relation to fear for the unknown, the future.

My first real experience with silence was when I stayed for a week in a Benedictine monastery (St. Benedict's mountain in Vaals, The Netherlands). Actually, and certainly with my experiences I had at that moment about self-development and spirituality, an inexplicable experience. I felt secluded and at the same time it made me happy. Immediately I got in contact with deeper life questions. With fear, grief and also with joy and gratitude. In that monastery I had the mystical experience that my hand suddenly felt caught by something bigger than me, or someone I could not see, when I was writing about my feeling. Something or someone took over my hand and began to write down the answers on a question I had about my son. I still have that hand written paper somewhere and described that experience in a diary that I kept for many years after our decision to get divorced for my children.

At about a one hour and fifteen minutes’ drive of the place where I live, there is a huge cave in a mountain (Bua Tong Cave). I regularly visit that place with personal guests. It is definitely not (yet) a tourist attraction. You can enter the ground floor of that cave or (together with monks) go into the catacomb. Also in this cave you can experience total silence and to be honest, it’s still a very strange phenomenon. Certainly if you have had the real experience feeling/connecting with real silence.

Silence makes listening a deeper and more intense sensation. You become much more sensitive for the art of listening. You expand your consciousness. And not only your consciousness in relation to listening. You widen the sensation of feeling, tasting, watching and smelling as well. All your senses will be more open and more sensitive. Some people call it a deeper connection with your authenticity.

Sound has turned into a ‘tool’ to run away from a deeper connection with yourself. To escape yourself. Silence, on the contrary, brings you in touch with yourself.

Silence is not the absence of something. It is your awareness, open your mind, for everything that is available for you.

It is quite common, getting older, you deal and engage with deeper (life)questions in your life. That you are looking for answers and directions to go. Life, after all, is a continuous expedition in relation to growth, personal development and sharing your uniqueness.
The strange thing is that we are used always to search for those answers and directions to go in the outside world. Silence does not work with that but, on the contrary, brings you in connection with your inner world. There, and nowhere else, all the answers on this type of questions are already available and waiting for you. You only need to discover them (discover/uncover = to remove the cover because those answers have been covered so far). It’s just to take the cover, the lit, the dust, of. You do not need to look for and will not find the real answers on this questions in that outside world.

In relation to your uniqueness, your way of life/life style, your passion, you already since birth, have everything you need inside to grow and share as it’s best meant to be for you. Because you are not aware of this (yet), you try to find and follow a different road, acting as your own personal helmsman telling him the direction you want. However, your life often has a something different ‘treasure’ for you. Something you might not want yet, but after all it will work out to be the best choice for your growth.

The message of silence is to connect you with your inner source. To create space to anticipate instead of abrupt react. There is nothing to ask. You only will receive. To be willing to receive that what’s waiting for you (and you are ready to receive) in the understanding that this several times is not what you want (yet). To surrender to life in full confidence that your life can not go wrong. You only have to live it…

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

Friday, June 16, 2017

Newsletters and magazines have lost their value. They are wasting time, effort and money…

Last week in my blog I memorized already that I "unsubscribed" all kind of newsletters and receiving (or buying) magazines. No longer they support me in my personal process of growth, focus on myself, learning myself better, and studying more. All things I try to do to live my life fuller and more in connection.

A long time ago already during all kinds of training's and even during a so-called 'Business Bootcamp' I was told at least to be on social media, have a blog, write and publish at least once in your life a book, and keep your relations and customers “warm” with sending them a regular newsletter. All to keep your company, your business or your organization in the spotlights.

More and more people, acting as flocks, followed this advice. And yes, I also was one of them (and still for a part I follow). I once wrote a book (not as a response to one of this calls but out of an inner call to leave something that can be shared in length of years). Stupid me I did not write that book in English. And for the same reason of inner calling, I continue with publishing my blog because I think there is something to share and possible to learn and they get a lot of response.

Last week I was invited to work a couple of times at the Four Seasons Resort. A wonderful place to be. I am always early to have some time to adapt, prepare and enjoy before my class starts. Twice, in the waiting area, I took a magazine in my hands, and yes, about health. It took me a while before I came across the first small article in those magazines about health. First I really got 10 pages with marketing about watches, diamond rings, luxury cars, perfume, houses with swimming pool, etc. Not what the title of the magazine promised I thought.
At the place where I live and work a short time ago we had photo shooting sessions. All for a Chinese magazine on travel and health. A publisher showed me three copies of the magazine. Fantastic pictures, beautiful quality paper and also here 6 pages to turn before the actual magazine started. Turning the pages I asked him at a certain moment when his magazine started. He had to laugh. Yes sir, otherwise the message we want to bring will be unprofitable ... !? What about too expensive? Aren’t we thinking in a strange kind of vicious circle? We have to pay for this magazine if we want to have it and also people who buy a car, perfume, make-up, etc.. pay for it. And then we think, because of this, we get it for a ‘cheaper’ price…

These magazines offer less and less value in relation to what the name of the magazine tries to believe you, you will get. It’s all about marketing. Even a Dutch mindfulness magazine called “Happinez”, has become an expensive periodical nearly only filled with marketing / advertisement. The actual content is not even 25%. Sorry but the truth (for me). A waste of money, time and trees (paper).

Only short and already a very long time ago I published newsletters. Tribes of people had and still have the guts to go on with it. The newsletters I got by post on paper had some value. They brought in the recycling some money for a charity foundation. The digital ones disappeared even faster by pushing a button on the computer and did not even bring any money for this foundation.

There is a lot of work to be done in setting up and developing a newsletter, and perhaps the great added value is that you, as a compiler, are aware and connected with everything that’s going on in  your life, your company, your business, your organization, or whatsoever. Just because you have to think about it writing it down. You are arranging.

Because of an overkill on newsletters you - wanted or unwanted - receive and the lack of time you have or want to take reading them, you can ask yourself if they have any left value.

Your newsletter is unique. Yes, that's right because you or your organization you write about is unique.
However, among those newsletters that are so digitally sent now, that uniqueness is not seen any longer. You only and easy press the button ‘delete’ to refer the newsletter that took so much effort to prepare to the digital recycle bin.

And, I am sorry to say, more and more this happened by me and, it’s just my opinion, I think there are many more people who do exactly the same. I do not have or take the time to read them, lots of them I never asked for, most of them do not have any value for me. They do not care me. Being more and more ‘buried’ under the “newsletter phenomenon” I unsubscribed nearly all of them. And yes, less and less emails. Creating rest to connect with things I really want to connect with.

In short, the overkill of newsletters from everything and everyone and the overkill in marketing in magazines for me destroyed the value of them. I ask myself what their contribution is in improving communication and understanding. For me it's just a matter of time and creating time and space by unsubscribing and not buying any longer.
The ‘news value’ I want to have I can find on the internet.

Step by step I really find and have more time to live life again without spending time on newsletters and magazines.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

Friday, June 9, 2017

As if I had said farewell to my life. On the contrary. Without (social) media I have just returned to even more LIVING life again.

Last May 3rd, in advance, I shared on social media that I would stop with my ‘memberships’ of the (social) media starting May 20th. That stopping is less easy than you think. To leave Facebook for instance took only technically two weeks. And that's already enough sign/message to me. Marketing clings like a tiger on your pants and to get rid of it ... not easy. I will also say goodbye to all kinds of digital and written newsletters and magazines soon. Within a couple of weeks I will write a blog about my mainspring to stop with them as well within a couple of weeks.

A good acquaintance I already know for a very long time sent me a few days after I quit with my (social) media an email with the text:

"Who 10 years ago had ever dared to assume that social media would be so influential in our lives?
That people say farewell and live a good new life to you when you tell them in advance that you will no longer be boundless available for our Holinesses Facebook, Twitter, etc .. You almost got the the status of hero. You choose to sail and connect with the big sea of life. The others stay behind on the quay…They lost you .... Goodbye Frans…

Funny because actually what has really changed. You're still the one you are. Anyone who's really in touch with you, knows how to reach you, just like before the Facebook era."

Reading this message and looking deeper into it, a big grin showed on my face. How well all the intent of my friends on the social media and being thankful and grateful for all the response ... for me there is a deep truth in his message.

I received praise. People who actually also wanted to quit with social media but could not do it (yet) because of all kind of general excuses, circumstances and… addiction. People who thanked me (thank you as well otherwise for your thanks) for all insights and pictures about my present life I posted. People who wished me luck and an even more happy life. Friends who granted me success and strength on my further life path. Even a serious attempt to ‘keep Frans on social media’.

And looking back on all the responses now, it still creates a kind of feeling as I said farewell to my life. Something that another acquaintance nearly literally wrote to me.

Nothing is less true to me. For a short period of time I even had a lot of time left (about 1,5 till 2 hours a day). This time now has been completed ‘consumed’ with real connecting and deepening. Indeed, that was my purpose and I got it. I LIVE life even more and more intense than ever. Unrestrictedly available and accessible ...? No, not anymore. I'm turning into the master of my life again and in what I really want. Connection with life, with myself, my kids, my girlfriend, my animals, nature, the people who get on my way or cross my path for a while. Rest, engagement, and more peace of mind. Being there, being available being in contact as it is meant to be. Less distortion and disturbance from any form of media with all kind of information that helps me to worry about things I cannot really change. Offering me, by marketing, all kind of things I have to buy to make me (temporary) happy. Showing me how ‘rich’ and ‘happy’ life can be. Wishing so many people; “May your life someday be as awesome as you pretend it is on social media”.

My love now is with the smaller world around me, with reclaiming face-to-face conversation, with growing by sharing my uniqueness with others (and they with me). Being just as ‘appealing’ on the inside as I am on the outside (nothing to hide the truth). Celebrating my life by moving on to bigger and better things. Living the philosophy to always stay true to my personal set of values. To enjoy even more spending my time in the outdoors on my own, with love ones or with our international guests surrounded by nature.

Blissful to choose for a deeper lifestyle and yes, there still is a long journey to discover and learn. A lifelong as long I do not run out of my time.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.”

Friday, June 2, 2017

“I go back to my Concrete Jungle again…” Don't play a game with your health!

This morning as usual I walked with my dog through the forest. Every day I try to visit at random different places. In the place where I was today, I had not been around for about a week. I almost did not recognize the path. After the first a bit heavy rainfall, the trees and bushes are exploding new, fresh, blissfully smelling green leafs.

A few days ago I said farewell to guests again. Increasingly, short, very intense and often emotional contacts become my life. Two of those guests thanked me and told me it was time for them to return to ‘the real world’. I've written a blog about this ‘the real world’ theme before. As if my world would not be a real world. One of those guests told me that after a week of nice experiences, connecting with herself and connecting with nature, she returned to the concrete jungle again. Where are you going? I asked her, not knowing this term so she explained. Do you recognize??? What is your jungle for happy (healthy) LIVING?

Many of our guests who visit the resort literally escape for a while their lifestyle and living environment. From more and more major cities, you can now book direct flights to Chiang Mai International Airport. Cities like Bangkok, Chengdu, Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur, Macau, Beijing, Beijing, Seoul, Shanghai, Shenzhen and, for example, Singapore to name a few. And with just a simple stopover, the connection with much more large concrete jungles (cities) is even much bigger.

During her study in Beijing, my daughter regularly showed me the huge amounts of smog and far unhealthy air pollution, common in this city. It literally made her sick. Many of our guests who live there tell me exactly the same. The street scene? Running especially busy people only connected with their mobile devices (as far you could see through the smog). Why do you want to ‘live’ an unhealthy life like this? Business Cities, Commerce, Gambling ... It's all about money.

The old principle that makes you believe that money makes life easier and ‘really’ more happy. Whether you get sick or not...
It takes you away of the idea that there is only one goal in life (called LIVING) and that health in living a sustainable life is the main asset. Do not play a game with your health for money and getting a shorter (unhealthy) life. Not stress, not pollution, not running, not distraction, but connection with the holistic approach. For that you need a right and healthy habitat.

LIVING life is living your uniqueness. To respond to your inner call (whatever the world thinks of it). To share and to grow. That’s the meaning of LIVING life. Making your live valuable. So not only the focus on making money (and destroying your health). Not even for a short period of your life because you are young and strong enough.

A week 'different' “I-experience” helps you to make clear what living your life really is all about and especially why ... Many people don't care about their health and take health for granted in the race for more money, more desires, (even) more "I". They forget that it's all temporary and they cannot take can not take anything at their last day... They, you, we, own nothing...

What do you choose in relation to your happiness and health? That concrete jungle full of running and digital connections, or the jungle in which you can authenticate connect with yourself, your supporting habitat and others beings to become happier?

Easier said than done? Don’t you have your responsibilities?
These therefore already are the first general excuses that toxify you. Let go and start LIVING whatever other people think of it. Take responsibility for yourself.

Too bad to earn a lot of money to spend after all to all kinds of specialists to make you healthy again. Your run out of time! Do not forget to live and especially to enjoy life.

It's later than you think!

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.”