Friday, February 22, 2013

Drop your masks! Better be yourself… ALWAYS!

How can it nevertheless be, that many people are not simply themselves? That is what I, many times hear and I feel it even more. At home they often act differently than when they are at work and/or even differently when they are in other places (maybe in a restaurant and/or networking). What actually is `being yourself’?

Now, while I did my training for Talent-coaching, I got more insight.

In your education you learn to adapt to your culture, the applying standards and values, the time and your surroundings. You learn, without even noticing, that you put on a mask or playing a role and  adapt to an external reality or community.

In Latin they use the word ‘Persona’. The way how you show yourself, with your mask or playing your role, to your environment and that is how you are seen (your appearance). The ‘persona’ often stands between the person who you really are and the outside (public) world. In everyday speech we call it ‘ your appearance’ or ‘your look’. After all behind your mask hides your true identity. Maybe you think that you’re environment doesn’t notice that you’re just acting, think twice…. Their feeling show differently. If you know that you’re keeping your “real self” secret, you also have to know that you are signaling (or radiate) unnatural energy. Many people in your neighborhood will see (or feel) that and pierce rapidly through that veil. Don't you do that yourself also almost infallible?

Your ‘I’ (Latin Ego) is  actually the centre of your wittingly activities like thinking, observing, feeling and your intuition. Your own identity is a very important feature of your ‘I’. Without ego there is no identity. But your ego is not the centre of your conscious and subconscious personality. That centre is called ‘Self’. Subconscious collective and personal experiences, feelings and facts are playing a distinguished role in this ‘Self’. Recognizing and acknowledging will be a intriguing ingredient of your personality.

By letting you subconscious mind ‘speak’ more often once in a while, you will get a treasure of information concerning who you are and what you are good at by nature. If you know that, why would you profile yourself still longer in affairs which don’t entirely belong to you and what you don’t like to  do? Why presenting yourself as someone else, if you can be YOU just who you are or can be?

If you bring your qualities and talents in a, for YOU, good consistency to full growth, you’ll beneficially start realizing YOURSELF and your mission (why and wherefore you’re on this planet). You accomplish, from out of your heart, your specific achievement and as a result, admit those of others as well. That process of development of your individuality is called individuation. You become personally aware. Becoming what you are in spirit. Simply be yourself in all circumstances. That will cost less energy, you have to think less, you don’t have to remember any longer or even write down everything you ever said in your different performances. And the best part… your environment… they knew it, in most of cases, anyway.

If you really know who YOU are, you can be very proud and there is nothing to be ashamed of or hide for. Why would you even consider acting in a role-play or adopting another role as that of your own?

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.”

Friday, February 1, 2013

Grow by sharing

Many plants / trees will grow better in small groups. Papaya Trees are a good example. They provide and share shade and rain (through their leaves) with and for each other and only bear fruit (cross-fertilization) by the presence of each other. The principle of growing through sharing.

In my opinion this is a perfect way to grow. Share your knowledge and skills with each other and deploy your talents and qualities. This is, in my view, absolutely no competition or abuse of others. As long as you also share your growth and where possible working together to achieve better results.

Every person has a unique set of talents and combination. There's really no one with the same combination. As 'talenteer'  I am experiencing that by working with talents and life missions of people. By developing what you're good at, rather than working on things that you don't like because you can't do themin your 'own way', you will grow in a natural way. If you dare to share with others is the sum of the performance more than the sum of the individual parts. You also have 'less' to do. You are in "flow" because you are doing things which you totally like. That will give energy rather than it will cost energy.

If you want to develop your 'birth gift' of talents then you'll need food, attention, space and freedom often also are required. You can compare your growth in opportunities and development with the cultivation of seeds.

Maybe you remember whether or not, from your childhood, the process of thé culture or breeding dish. You fill it with fertile soil, put in the seeds, provide sufficient water, light and energy. Heat which provided by the sun and protected by the glass or plastic cover over the cultivation container, is built up. From that moment on you give, on one hand, the process rest and on the other, attention.

If your attention wanes, you no longer give food or water, you can see the seeds come up and dry out completely. Not conducive in order to grow, let alone eventually to flourish.
Also, you don't want to stand on those seeds. Should you do it anyway, and if you eventually already have seen results, you'll see the damage incurred.

Once the seeds germinated , the seedlings will start growing in a steady pace. Until that at any moment will take other forms. If the space is too small, the plants compete with each other. They 'steal' each others light and draw nutrients away from each other. One will grow better than the other ... however none of them will grow in an optimal way. Time to do some repotting. More space to grow. A gardener knows like no other the right time to repot in order to give each plant the best opportunity for growth.
This process must successively take place a number of times.

Eventually, when the plants already are small trees, it will be good for them, to put them, with enough space in between, in the 'full soil'.

If you viewed, in the light of the story above, your own process of growth and development, you might want to take time to give answers to the questions that I have written below.

Are you working or living in an environment that invites you to grow and develop personally?
-           Are you working or living in an atmosphere where your stage of growth is similar to that of the organization or your environment?
-           Do you get enough room for growth?
-           Are you nourished enough?
-           Do you get enough attention?
-           Do you have to compete with others?
-           Is there enough challenge?
-           Can you grow by sharing with others?
In some programs of Villa Asia we will go deeper into that material. Understanding and directions for solutions are 'born' in a natural way in people . A revelation, to experience the 'profit' of guests afterwards.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.”