Friday, November 25, 2016

The power of touching. Encounter jewels of aliveness and energy in your existence.

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or a small act of caring. All having the potential to change a day, a week, a month, even a lifetime."

(Quote I got a short while ago from a good acquaintance Arnaud Nilwik from The Netherlands)

This quote for me was the ‘spark’ to write this week my blog about touch.

Touch is one of the sensations processed by the somatosensory system giving rise to touching behavior (source: Wikipedia).

Ever thought about this idea? Just take some time to look more deeply. Watching, smelling, tasting and hearing are all touching. 

Thinking about the art of listening for instance. Hearing is a sensation of sound waves travel through the outer ear, impacts (touch) the eardrum and causes to vibrate. Modulated by the middle ear it is transmitted to the nerves transmitting information to the brain, where it is registered as sound. 
So you can see hearing as touching. And touching is connecting with energy flow.

As Wikipedia mentions, you can be touched physically and mentally / emotionally. Both in a positive or negative way. All having to do with the intention or expression of something (a person, animal, thing, situation) in the outer world on you.

When Abraham Maslow studied happy people, one of the things he determined was that they all had what he called highly potentiated lives. They could deeply enjoy the smell of coffee being brewed first thing in the morning if that’s what was in the room, or the sound of toast being buttered. When their child took their hand it wasn’t just a sensation, it filled up their whole (well-)being. Happy people had a “high porosity to aliveness”. These people soaked up life.

We mistakenly think that touching - so watching, listening, smelling and tasting as well - occur on the periphery of our self, are a kind of surface things. But truthfully each surface stimulus travels far into the most hidden interior landscapes of our self. An integrated energetic body, mind and even soul connection takes shape. 

The necessity of nurturing our senses and play with inner and outer caring and healing energy is very clear when we are at our youngest. Slightly older we typically found ways to build a huge, varied diet of using our senses and energy connection into our lives. Feeling inside the frequency, textures and intensities of this constant, rich field of contact.

As we grow up we exchange this banquet of physical contact for…. well, often for very little. 
We eroded our “body-mind-soul” connection. Caused by internal and/or external factors. 

Internal we hear the voices of our - wanted or unwanted - guides in life / our programming. Or we protect / armor ourselves out of fear or not  to be hurt (again). 
External influences like culture, religion, habitat, ‘expected behavior’, living an unbalanced, chaotic lifestyle and lack of responsibility in using the social media and the internet, have their impact.   

These causes gradually can have limited our ability to be present and to express and experience the essence of who we, fully and freely, really are and what we really want. We slowly become cut off from our feelings and the ability to experience our creative inner energy in a connected, joyful, loving flow.

For most of us growing up coincides with a reduction in the range and quality of our tactile life. Our diet of nurturing physical contact and dealing with energy thins out, narrows down. 

Ask yourself: "How went my tactile day today so far?" 

Touching (so actually being aware of the influences of all our senses) is main part of one of our regular workshops (Tantra journey of senses and energy). It’s remarkable to see how people release feathered and sparkling life energy full of unexpected potency and make themselves available for that what wants to 'show' itself.

It shows our senses and consciousness of energy could properly be regarded as instruments to deeply connect, to explore, and as a form of nutrition. 

Overriding the harness of the known, allowing to explore what is possible, fearless entering a field of endless possibilities... goes beyond of what the head (thinking mind) can contain. Bringing the unconscious in the conscious elevating your quality of awareness. An interweaving of the energies of many levels of consciousness from the ordinary to the most intense. A path of integrating body, mind and soul. Realizing your full potential as a free unique human being.

Touch more in a positive way, with the right intentions, physically and/or mental / emotional. 
Be open and willing to be touched. Explore to soak up life (again). Be aware of a kaleidoscope of (new) manifestations of intuitively feeling. Get a deeper and more meaningful connection with yourself and others. Redefine limitations and blockages of your mind, of body veils, body armoring and barriers. 

Change someone’s day, week, month or even his/her lifetime using the positive power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or a small act of caring. 

Encounter jewels of aliveness and energy in your existence.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight
“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

Friday, November 18, 2016

Insomnia by the outcome of elections??? Stop it! Who is the master of your life?

The last days two guests came to me to explain why they could not join my early morning class and Dharma talk. Not necessary to give me an explanation. Everybody is free to join. It’s your holiday here with us you know? But still. They felt sad about it.

Both of them told me they could not get rest anymore and could not sleep in the night because of the outcome of the elections. Not only this two guest but also, being a member of the Chiang Mai Expatsclub, I hear a lot of people suffering about this.

My blog for this week was already ready but I will publish it next week to make space for this theme.

Suffering and insomnia has to do with the things you create in your mind. The feeling, caused by your sub- or pré conscious mind has everything to do with our past experiences in life. A feeling in relation to fear and thinking not being able to handle new situations to come.

So you create stories and situations, other people are very willing to even help you with this process, and you start trying to find how to deal with it. Be aware, you only think this situations will appear and out of fear you create plan ‘A’, ‘B’ and ‘B+’ to prepare yourself for things that are NOT going to happen this way. This drains your energy and create more fear. It helps you to get away of enjoying life, it creates suffering and not at all peace of mind.

If you cannot trust yourself, who else can you trust. Thinking of wars for instance. Every decennium or even a shorter period somewhere in the world they are. New terrorist attacks are waiting and for sure will come somewhere again. But are you willing to get insomnia by all of this and especially because of the outcome of elections?

Once I read a wonderful story told by Allen Wilson Watts (6 January 1915 – 16 November 1973)

The Story of the Chinese farmer:

Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer, whose horse ran away. And all the neighbors came around to commensurate that evening, “So sorry to hear your horse has ran away. That’s too bad.” And he said, “Maybe.”

The next day the horse came back, bringing seven wild horses with it, and everybody came around in the evening and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You’ve now got eight horses.” And he said, “Maybe.”

The next day his son tried to break one of these horses and ride it and was thrown and broke his leg. And they all said, “Oh, dear that’s too bad.” And he said, “Maybe.”

The following day the conscription officers came around to recruit to force people into the army and they rejected his son, because he had a broken leg. And all the people came around and said, “Isn’t that great.” And he said, “Maybe.”

“The whole process of nature is a process of immense complexity and it is really impossible to tell whether something that happens in it is good or bad. Because you never know the consequences of the misfortune. Or, you never know the consequences of good fortune.”

You can ask yourself: “Who is the master of my life?” Are this your thoughts or is this you?
Do not create all stories that will never exist or do not exist yet.

You can totally trust yourself. You already showed in your life you have enough resilience to adapt to new situations if they arrive.

Live and enjoy life. Did worrying ever helped you already in life?

Stop it and get some sleep.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

Friday, November 11, 2016

The harvest of multitasking.

Yes, I know, I’m from a different (maybe old) generation. My two children are much better at multitasking than me. And yes, in my previous career as a CEO I did my best to do tasks or activities at the same time as much as possible. Living a different lifestyle here in Thailand I ‘m losing it more and more.
I feel a little guilty, because I might to have been able to do more useful and valuable things in the same time frame…

Now I am learning more about mindfulness (the energy to be 100% present) and awareness (sensory perception) I got the insight this thought is not the truth and it’s very easy to explain why.

Occasionally I do with guests an exercise in relation to this. In general, it is stated that women are better in it than men, and, in practice, this appears to be the truth hearing the results.
I ask my guests to just be quiet for a moment, close their eyes and for themselves to perceive how many things they can think of at the same time.
Women sometimes come out at four or five. Men usually remain hanging on three or four.
And the real solution? They do not tell the truth. It is not possible at all.

Our mind, in optimal condition, offers us ‘only’ 100% conscious awareness. When we multitask we divide this 100% into pieces. We divide our attention on the many tasks or activities we believe we are able to do in the same amount of time. We connect our thoughts to those tasks or activities. 

And in the same way as it is not possible to breath in or exhale two, three or four times in the same time, so it is also not possible to think on two, three, four or even five things at the same time. What we actually do is we accelerate our thinking process and are not even able anymore to see it as different following thought high speed. You can see it as going to the movie and speed up the film. The individual picture frames show up faster but you are not really getting a nice and relaxed view watching the movie this way. You serve yourself with an overkill of incentives and enable yourself to be fast(er) tired.

When we are fully aware and connected to something we do, we do not make (m)any mistakes. Speeding up doing more and more things in the same time, we create the opportunity to do make many mistakes. These errors should be repaired but we want and have to do it in the same time. So, we create even more tasks to do in the same time. Even in our personal lives we want to do things SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time-bound), creating less and less opportunity to give creativity and ‘professional improvisation’ a chance.
So in the same time we add even more (repair) work and increase our stress. At the end of the day you were certainly very ‘busy’ and maybe, tired, ask yourself: "What I've actually been doing today and what have I accomplished?"

When you think of the quality of your work and your involvement with it, you can put a lot of question marks. And I'm not even talking about the nearly continuous abuse and diversion because of the way we want to stay 'connected' with our digital resources with everything that is happening in the world around us.

In any case at least you can see the ‘harvest’ of multitasking as:
-       Less attention
-       More chance of errors
-       Creating and building up more and more stress
-       Lower quality and connection
-       A sense of under performance and less achievement 
-       Less enjoyment of the fun you can experience doing the thing you do. 

Experience has been shown in various studies that it is not only a sense of under-performance, but it is less achievement.

The "harvest" of multitasking? How do you get more stressed and become less productive and connected to life?

So, slow down your pace. Be more connected to the tasks and activities that you do and enjoy. Do less different things in the same time. If you eat for example, be aware of the food and of tasting (doing this, usually you eat even less). Enjoy that activity the fullest. A cell-phone on the table distract your attention from the art of enjoying your food.

Create more quality again, less stress, meaning and ... in the long run much more achievement.

I am happy and grateful that I am from an 'old' generation and can and try to live life the fullest.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

Friday, November 4, 2016

Oil!? You do not know the value of what you got? Don't find it. It’s already there! Be more healthy.

A couple of weeks ago I woke up with a tremendous pain in my left knee. I could not bend my leg anymore and had big problems to go downstairs because I could not walk. A very strange experience.
It took a day and actually I wanted to go to the hospital to make some x-rays to see what was wrong. The voice of my dad in my head told me (as he always said to his patients in his massage practice); “Go on moving. Do it gently. If it’s hard to do, give it a try taking a warm shower or try to go for a swim.”
With a swimming pool in my backyard not hard to go for a swim. Though it took me a while to reach the pool and to enter the water. Very, very slowly, I felt disabled , I tried to move but could not really swim. Believe it or not. The next day I woke up and everything was totally fine and without any problem I could walk again. So far it did not appear again.

This experience made me aware of the fact I do not even value what I got. Never worried about the vitality of my life. But actually it is a wonder, you know? Most of us do not take the time, are not even aware, of this wonders of life. We take health for granted when we are healthy. We do not care and go on living our life like; breakfast, lunch, dinner, work and so on in a repeating and continuing, unaware process. Not at all connected anymore about what life really is all about. Until the day it is ‘ocean view’, the final rest…

We only get worry when we get to that stage. When we are healthy we think that that stage is too far off. I am still OK. I am still walking. You do not know the value of your limbs until you cann't walk or hold something with your hands anymore. You do not know the value of your eyesight until you lose them. You do not value what you have got.

We forget that health needs a holistic approach and there need to be a personal balance in that. Physical body, Mind, Emotion, the Spiritual part and Causal (environmental) part (your relation to energy givers / energy drainers in your habitat). All five need to get (at least some) attention.

And when we think about or want to work on our health most of the time it is connected with the physical body. We go to the gym, start running, start moving, do fitness programs, etc. Some people tell themselves this even helps to empty their mind… Possibly this can be but most of the time you can see it as a temporary change of your attention from your regular worrying thoughts. 

Getting older we experience the physical part of our self is getting older. Just accept this natural process. You will never win a kind of battle to keep a young body forever as marketing tries you to believe. You will always lose this battle.
The mind, on the other hand is able to become more and more vital. Spirituality (and please refer to a wider range of experiences than only the traditional religious approach) is part of being in good health as well. It helps you to connect with meaning of life and with the value of all that is stored in you.

You do not know the value of air until you cannot breath anymore. When you are aware of breathing, for instance during meditation, you are visualizing the molecules flowing inside and outside again, feeling the air going in to cleans and out to let go. Ever thought about the meaning of that?
That visualization gives you the vitality of life! It makes you understand the vitality of life. What is life? That in and out breath? You take that breath for granted. Because it’s free. If the government starts to charge us for air, give us the bill every month for every  of breathing air we used, we will worry about it and start complaining.

We start worrying when something fails. During our regular “breakfast, lunch, dinner, work life” we are improving our ego, improving our greediness and… increasing our problems. We do not contemplate on our life very often. Torturing ourselves without even knowing. Losing our real self.

During one of my last classes I followed a teacher explained.
Think about this; When a person is very happy telling you: “I found oil!”  Actually what is he telling you?
It is the wrong expression. It’s not true. Even before he found it, it was already there. The oil is always underground. It does not matter if he found it or not. It’s misnamed to say I found the oil. No, it’s already there. You extracted it by using other means.

With contemplation and meditation we work on our health. We extract that ‘oil’ in ourselves. That oil of meaning. That ‘oil’ of direction. That ‘oil’ of uniqueness. That ‘oil’ of answers. That ‘oil’ of spirituality.

The question is are you interested in extracting that ‘oil’, or do you not really care now?
My experience... Don’t wait till ‘ocean view’ to learn, use and share the great values you got.

Frans Captijn
Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight“Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.”