Touching and touching but 'not touching'

In 2016 I already wrote a blog about touching (“The powerof touching. Encounter jewels of aliveness and energy in your existence..”). Doing a course at the moment to become a certified Tantra teacher, touching again gets a lot of attention and brings even more insight for me.

There is a lot to discover in relation to touching. Physical aspects and sensations of feeling differences in temperature, structure, size, softness, etcetera, but, on the other hand and with an even deeper meaning the energetic sensation. The connection or flow of life-force energy.

Actually, we touch with all our senses and all the information together brings an emotion and the quality of connection formed by our mind.

Doing this course now, again made clear to me that there are different ways of touching. Real touching connection and touching ‘not touching’. And you cannot lie about it because people (especially women) feel it.

As an example, you just have to walk in a walking street and see (and even feel) the sensations of people walking hand in hand. A young (or elderly) couple in love or people who hold each other’s hand but are not really interested at all in each other anymore. Holding a kind of dead end. Touching, not touching.

Doing my course to become an actor, many years ago, we learned over one hundred ways to say ‘Yes’. Around five in a way you actually express ‘No’. It’s just the way you say it.

And with touching it is the same but… you cannot act or fool somebody even if you think you are a professional in it. It is not only the way you touch. The life-force energy that is involved in touching makes the difference. It shows, intuitively and totally right, if the expressed actions of touching of the other person is the right one or just only fake. Something, by the way,  that says a lot about the person you try to connect with.

And maybe women are more sensitive for it then men as my Tantra course proposes. But men, it’s just nature, also have this or can develop (and do not forget animals who are maybe the most sensitive for it). You feel (experience) the difference between real connection and unreal (dead end) connection. Also, in the art of loving.

Some last words.

In Asia I live in a culture not really used to touching. And at the moment because of that worldwide virus a ‘distance society’ is created.

People think technique and all kind of social media will keep us connected. In a way that’s true. On the other hand, we need to understand that any life-force energy flow, needed to feel real, deep and high-quality personal connection, will be more and more lost. Putting at stake the quality of friendships and relationships.

Awareness, right intentions, time for each other without disturbances, focus,  being relaxed an touching are elements that truly help to make them stronger. Maybe Tantra can help.

Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)

email: captijninsight@gmail.com 

Building blog:
https://pyramidhousethailand.blogspot.com 

Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.

A divorce ritual. Great idea.

On YouTube I just saw the free movie “Just Breath”. I thought a thriller but that turned out differently. A really catchy theme that appealed to me in relation to divorce issues.

The movie takes you into the behavioral and parental problems of a daughter from a broken family. The focus is on her and actually, at the end of the film that is said literally, it is not her fault at all, but her parents are the source.

The reason it appealed to me so much was that we (my former wife and I) too, out of love, were blessed and able to bring two fantastic kids into this world. They are world citizens now. Our love affair turned into hate and this movie also shows what and how that looks like. Communication not possible anymore because of a deep-rooted and two-party feed past. Children who, especially when one of the parents falls in love with someone else again, and in the movie the new couple being even pregnant again, totally lost direction and felt lonely.

It is only normal that children get lost a little. And the easiest thing is to point at them where that finger should actually be pointing at Mom and Dad.

A more than sensible new partner in the movie, who knows how to handle it despite all the difficulties. Hats off and a lot to learn from (also by me). What a sensible and resilient sweet woman.

Her idea of ​​going for a divorce ritual is fascinating and effective. Children need to know that they were born out of love and have a voice in the whole process, however the age they may have.

OSHO said it all already. You can thank each other for the time together because you both opened new doors for each other. New visions of life that you could never have opened on your own. Love has no beginning or end. If you know how to love, you also know how to separate. That is not in anger, not in rage, not with a grudge, not with any complaint, but with tremendous gratitude, with great love, with thankfulness in the heart.

“Just Breath” a good mirror with a lot of lessons for when you are in a process of divorce or when you have completed such a process. And that divorce ritual at the end of the film ... not a crazy thought. Also to let your children know that there was once love between each other and the divorce was not meant to hurt your children but to allow freedom (to breath) in ongoing love.

Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)

email: captijninsight@gmail.com 

Building blog:
https://pyramidhousethailand.blogspot.com 

Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.

No time to work. Where did I ever find this time?

Recently I said that I can't imagine where I ever found the time to work. Days, weeks and months really fly by.

In the past, work weeks of over 60 hours have been normal for me. Total madness when I look back on it now. The saying and the question; "Do you live to work or do you work to live?" I totally went to that live to work. I just didn't notice it myself.

And when I look back on it in a financial sense, as the "boss" of the organization, I think that many of my staff went home with more salary per working hour than I did. They adhered to the 36 hours and usually also enjoyed good private and family life.

And going on ‘with your tongue on your shoes’ until your retirement age? I laugh about it now. And yes, that is a lot of financial sacrifice. Happy, so far still until now, in good health. Being able to change the course that living (instead of working) is called to be quite a bit.

I have been living without a work schedule and agenda for over eight years now. In fact, I haven't spent time on social media for years. You would think plenty of time. Well… not. No stress indeed, but always well-filled days with things that I generally still (or again) love to do. We do what the day invites us to do and are now quite flexible. We have time. Doing nothing for a day? Still not got that present ;).

And that saying with that question… It is completely off the track. I no longer live to work. I no longer work to live. I Live. Something for which I am more than grateful that I can do this like I do.

An insight in retrospection is that I robbed myself and my family too much of time that life is really about. Great to be able to experience that insight not totally too late.

Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)

email: captijninsight@gmail.com 

Building blog:
https://pyramidhousethailand.blogspot.com 

Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.

 

‘Incident’ with hazardous goods. No panic at all. Because of a ‘slightly’ different approach?

Last Monday we had to go to town to renew my girlfriend's driver's license. That is really only possible by taking the highway.

After a few minutes driving we saw some orange traffic cones on the road to go a little to the right (we drive left in Thailand). There was a large green petrol truck parked on the hard shoulder and we had to get around it a bit. And when we got closer, we saw another fuel truck. I estimate at least about 24,000 liters. Another color and it lay on its side on the shoulder. Powder extinguisher next to it and two men were pumping fuel from the ‘accident’ truck into the green truck. Apparently, something had gone wrong with the steering early in the morning. A concrete high-voltage pole had snapped like a matchstick but the cables had not broken. I stopped past the accident to take a picture and spoke to one of the people who was pumping over. It would take until about midnight, he said, because the overturned truck was full of gasoline.

Police, a short distance away, were busy with daily work. Speed ​​control with a checkpoint. We were allowed to continue.

From my previous job, I missed the traffic infarct, kilometres of traffic jam, a lot of fire brigade, foam, evacuation, a so-called Large-scale Regional Incident Response Procedure, etcetera, in this accident. The companies around it also continued to work. Hardly any attention was paid to this incident. Traffic on the highway just kept going and I was the only momentary spectator.

After we passed the checkpoint, I told my girlfriend about how different things were in my previous work. I have written about it before that, in retrospect, I think that our safety rules and our actions were sometimes completely overdone. Sometimes I even wonder if we really made things and situations more safe or more unsafe.

The next morning the truck was gone. Everything cleared without any problems. 

Which approach is better? This blog is not about that. Just another approach that apparently works too 😉.

Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)

email: captijninsight@gmail.com 

Building blog:
https://pyramidhousethailand.blogspot.com 

Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.