Last week, once again, I was remembered of this by someone from the Netherlands and someone from Germany. Many negative feelings came back again.
I would like to share with you how I have arranged my dealing with (e)mail after past experiences. Not as the ‘Columbus egg solution’ but perhaps to make you think about it and take some action to get even more control back over your life.
Unfortunately, in the nineties I was in a tedious and long-lasting, sometimes harassing, process of divorce. Nothing unique so to say but still. And when I listened to the stories of those two persons a lot of things came back up again about how I experienced that time and how things often still go. Distractions of your weekend, interruptions of night's rest by ... yes mail.
Perhaps I think too negatively by saying after this experiences nowadays, it felt like a sort of conspiracy theory. Usually I received again another thick letter from some legal firm on Saturday morning or I received an email on Friday afternoon. As if included in the curriculum of the legal profession to make the 'weekend enjoyment' as a special ‘additional gift’ bad for the 'opponent' of their 'client'.
'Curiously' you open the messages and… your weekend is ruined. That free time you got just to recharge is being occupied with thoughts, anger, disbelief, and so on. And not only during the day, especially at night.
And of course it is not just and only about the legal profession. I am sure you know several examples from your personal experiences.
Once more this is another aspect to take control back about how you want to live your life. And yes, directing your mail and email requires some discipline. You need to learn to get rid of your addict behavior to read and respond directly. Actually I was amazed, better to say positively surprised, about how quickly my outside world was used to my different way of dealing and approaching my (e)mails. I even get a lot of nice and positive reactions to it.
I would like to share my personal approach as an example with you.
# First of all, I open letters that I receive on Friday or Saturday only on Monday.
# I also took my email movement back in my own hands. Not directly replying as an addicted routine anymore but reading and responding only two times a week.
If people send me an email (both related to business as well as private) they will automatically receive the following message in English and Dutch:
Thank you for your message.
As I continue a “digital fasting and detox” program, I live life and enjoy engaged face-to-face connections (and conversations) with people, friends and nature even more.
That’s why I check my emails only twice a week: Monday and Thursday mornings before noon in Thailand (GMT+7).
If necessary I try to respond within two days after your email is read.
Thank you for your understanding and have a nice day.
Till today, this two actions contribute to more rest and almost no disturbance of my generally very nice weekends.
Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.