When we got back home, I finally knew what I wanted to be. Coach driver. Ever changing groups and contacts, exploring the world, accountability and above all a lot of fun. The image that I had from that trip, among other things.
By the way, if I had taken that path, I certainly would have had my own travel agency (FIT, Frans International Touring Service). That name has lasted a large part of my life. All my engineering projects carried that name and I also organized ski trips to Germany, Austria and Italy with rented Ford Transit vans.
When I received an application form at my request to become a driver from a bus company, my mother tore the letter up before my eyes. There were more qualities in me and I should continue studying, she thought. And yes, I did.
Now I know that my mother (and also father), from their thinking and background, actually wanted to push me towards something else. In their eyes, a better direction. And, mind you, that was from their best intentions. They wanted to do everything they could to ensure that their children had a good future. Hats off and I'm super grateful for it too.
What they actually didn't realize was that the road to achieving a good future is much easier if you allow the inner drive, I call it the soul, to freely deal with all the specific talents that someone has in them, to take on the path of life to go.
To push is to bring someone in the direction you want. Whether that makes that person happy and brings out all of his or her talents is still the question.
I too, towards my two children, took over that push behavior a bit. It actually led to nothing. Generational difference and different views also played a role in this. As parents, you often worry too much about your children's future. You rely too little on their own qualities to allow their future to emerge. After all, they come from you and you should trust that basis.
Stopping that pushing and letting them trust their own abilities yielded surprising results. For example, after her study oriental languages (Chinese) my daughter chose not to see her future in that. She left for Australia, started working with horses and started a new training as a specialist car mechanic also for the mining industry.
And for my dear son it is mainly about having fun in his work and life. Don't sit still, but tackle things and be there for others (including animals).
Daughter, son and parents are happy. After all, it is their life. A matter of letting go on the path of life that is unfolding.
Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)
https://pyramidhousethailand.blogspot.com
Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.
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