VIP? Every person is unique. The imprisonment of the “P” of a not being so “V”

More and more I am observing the ongoing show people make of life where they are acting who they think they are. A lot of time just only an expression of the ego. They call themselves VIP’s or other people create VIP’s of them out of personal dependency.

I think it has to do with the programming my parents gave me and my cultural background, thankful for that, but I never ever felt very impressed by the ongoing VIP-shows. Being in the middle, sometimes even the spotlights, arranging outcomes and people around them behaving as a kind of slaves.

Actually I always felt this people cannot be their selves. Behaving to expectations and so not able to show all their uniqueness, not really having a private life any more.  

I still remember, being a young professional fire-chief, with a part of my staff members we went for lunch at the restaurant of the Ministry of Defense who had a department in the city I lived in and worked for. At a certain moment during one of our lunches a lot of ‘panic’ and everybody was summoned to stand up next to their chairs because the general was entering the restaurant. He was mend to be a VIP visiting his own department. That’s all great and well and still for me the question was why this panic, why this show. And yes I know it is possible a way to show respect but do you show respect behaving as a kind of subservient showing dependency not being dependent at all of him?

A unique human being enters a place full of other unique human beings in the restaurant. So we stayed seated and I had a nice and funny conversation with the general afterwards because the uniform of the fire-brigade in The Netherlands, at that time, had much in common with the uniforms of the Royal Dutch Navy. He showed up to be just a normal human being like every one of us.

Just before I started to write this blog I got an article from a former Dutch colleague who was impressed because a mayor of a Dutch town (a VIP but also just a human being) made his apologies to a farmer in his town about something he first expressed in the media. Is this stunning news because he is a VIP showing he is (just as the farmer) just an unique human being as well?

More and more visitors we have at our resort seem to have or get a ‘VIP status’. Taking the role of an observer it’s a wonderful show to enjoy. People getting nervous and acting different because of a ‘celebrity’ who arrived.

When I tell about my former job as CEO people a lot of times ask me what I did and where. I tell them it was in Zeeland, province of the Netherlands. They tell me they know New-Zealand but no… I am so sorry, that’s not the place. It’s called Zeeland! Where is that? They do not know… I feel sad they never heard about it. Sometimes they do not even know where The Netherlands are.

I ask them if the know our prime minister or our former queens commissioner and the chairman of our political board and I mention their names. Or the mayor of the capital of our province Middelburg. They are all VIP’s in a certain way I guess but… the answer still is no… ;(. Some people know our lovely Dutch queen.

One of my neighbors here is a former American pilot, now a pilot and flight instructor. He told me, talking about this VIP theme, a couple of times he had VIP’s on board. Famous Hollywood movie stars. The crew members at that time were very enthusiastic and exited and wanted to go for a signature (nowadays possible even a selfie together with the 'celebrity'). It did not bother him. He told me his thought “He or she was not a legend in his own time, he was a legend in his own mind.”

Very important persons most of the time seem to be not ‘Very’ important. They are possibly well known in a part of society, a town or a village. And even having a million followers on Facebook or Weibo does not say (for me) you are very, very famous, special or important. Only like me, unique. I never heard about most of them, like they never heard about me. But why do you need to be 'Very' Important?

The show made around a so called VIP puts the person (the P) in a kind of prison. Even their houses many times are guarded, protected by walls and camera systems. What about a ‘private’ life?

The so called importance of a person is created out of status, position, power, narcissism, money and dependency we (think) we have. Not because of his or her uniqueness. It is something else for me in relation to respect. But as a VIP be respectful to other unique human beings as well. Lots of times I see a different behavior at our place.

So maybe we can help VIP’s to become VUP’s. Better even make it shorter to UP’s (Unique Persons, like everybody else). Helping them out of their imprisonment of VIP’s. 

As my parents told me: “Just do normal, that’s crazy enough”. Respect every person as long as he or she deserves it in a normal way and respect you in return. They are not God.

The Thai way of doing the so called “Wai” (Greeting saying: “A lotus for you, the Buddha (inside yourself) to be”. The invitation just to be the one you are. Just be yourself, everyone else is already taken.

Show your uniqueness not how important you are. It will take some time and maybe till eternity I guess. In the meantime I go on being the observer, enjoying the show people make of showing their unique lifestyle in public. 

Frans Captijn

Host / Catalyst / Talenteer at Captijn Insight

Captijn Insight: “Catalyst in your process to new sustainable flow in life and work. Whether you are an individual, couple, team or an organization.” 

www.captijninsight.com

captijninsight@gmail.com