Don't worry about your study choice. It does not limit your (uncertain) future.

One evening, a few weeks ago, I had a conversation with a young Chinese woman. She was in tears. She told me she didn't know which study to choose and missed a goal in her life. What about that? All her friends already had and she still did not find answers. Her parents were very concerned about that. They had a study direction for her future (and expectations) in mind that also fit into their family tradition, but she didn't like that at all. Only thinking about that made her feel very unhappy, emotional and even sick.

When I look back at my experiences with many staff members with whom I was allowed to work with in various places, and also at the many people I have met here in Thailand so far, I am always amazed by all those personal stories and wanderings people have made in their life. With regard to their work and occupation, they have in most cases ended up very differently from what they had previously studied and intended to do in the future. Do you call that a study choice mistake? In my eyes this type of mistakes do not exist at all. Don’t worry there are ‘wrong’ choices in this.

I still remember my own school and student time, as well as my children's time in this. It was sometimes pretended by others, even my parents, that your life and future depended on what study you would choose.

In fact at the end of primary school, it starts with maddening parents, and also children, in relation to the results of the testing and the associated school advice for your next steps to make.

Looking back at it, you were taught a kind of stress. Crazy thoughts as if your choice would be ‘wrong’ and if you were to achieve a too low level, well then you were completely doomed to bring it far up the social ladder in your life. Practice shows that this is all nonsense. My personal experience is different and also that of the many people I was allowed to work with and that I received here during life & talent coaching. So many examples of people who found their ultimate (work) happiness totally different from what they studied or were trained for.

After my primary school I received a high middle/high school advice. After a year I was thrown out of that school and I went to low middle school. A shame?  Looking back, it was a fantastic experience, it was the right step to learn how to learn and… it was great fun. Then back to high level college again. After all, 3 years wasted? No, of course not. Yes, in the eyes of those people who want to get straight to their goal. In my eyes now, six years of experience richer. So much, lessons and life experiences learned, fun and the experience of learning with pleasure in connection. This time was the birthplace, or initiator, of my creativity.

I myself once started in the hospitality branch and got my degrees to run a hotel, cafe, restaurant. I worked in it for 4.5 years. I did a training to become a truck and coach driver. Worked only briefly in it and yet again an experience in my backpack. Ski instructor, what fun and bliss. Contractional engineer and architecture. Worked in that profession for a while in Saudi Arabia. Then the academy of fire & rescue service up to and including Master of Crisis and Disaster Management. After that Buddhist philosophy, theatre school, and life & talent coaching and two years ago I finished to call myself Kundalini yoga teacher. And I think there will probably be something more to come on my path.

People sometimes think strangely about my daughter’s study and future. She has such a nice degree from her study Oriental languages ​​(Chinese business and communication) in her pocket. After she got it, she went to Australia. She started with farm work, taking care of horses and cows (for her Visa) and had and has a great experience. Especially with her boss who acks as a kind of second father and appreciates the way she supports in the job. And for a year and a half now she is doing a study in engineering for special vehicles for the mining industry in Australia. A kind of combined car, hydraulic and air conditioning technician. A matter of just doing and following your feeling. Really something else than Chinese. So far she shines.

My son is still faithful to his basic profession as an animal caretaker. He has had some intermediate steps in technology and as a professional soldier. Just tasting to see (because he knows) there is more for him. And he also feels free to make totally different choices when he thinks it will make him happier. He is a different type and takes the time to make steps instead of to just jump.

My girlfriend went to university here in Thailand and got her university degree in food sciences with a specialization in poultry farming industry. She worked fairly briefly in it and found out that the financial world (the banking system and market) so far was more reserved for her. And who knows she is also changing direction. She is open to it.

The nice thing about all four of us is that if you look at our trees of like (personal trees of talents), the things that have come our way fit exactly. It seems like a sort of surrender to what nature had in store for you. And that does not only apply to the four of us, but to everyone with whom I have been able to work with so far.

Last Wednesday evening we welcomed a new member to our photo club. A nice story of how it works in practice. Until he was 21, he absolutely did not know what he wanted to do, he said. At that moment, just for fun, he got a camera in his hand and started working with it. Learning by doing. Someone noticed that he was taking beautiful pictures. He went on and made progress. Also started with making movies what turned out to be an international film director now. He met his wife who is also a photographer and filmmaker. They travel all over the world and make documentaries, photo reports and give courses worldwide, earning lots of money earning a wonderful living with their activities. Reason enough to take a break now and then in Chiang Mai.

My advice is not to worry so much about whether or not you make "the right" study choices, but especially to choose what you think you can enjoy most in your personal development at that moment. Something that stimulates you to develop in a playful way. What does not say (only) go for partying because at the long term this will not offer you the development of all the talents you have in the best possible way. Even skip the earning money issue. It will come. 

Do you really think that your "right" choice offers you security and certainty for your future? One thing is certain about that future, that it is enormously uncertain for you. Then why should you go for a goal? Actually it will give you winkers. Too much focus without even recognizing there is so much more to discover (to learn) in life. Yes, indeed, maybe only that one goal ... to LIVE life.

Wrong study choice? Does that exist? Take a nice walk on the path that is (already) created and waiting for you. Provides you less stress, more fun and gigantic beautiful experiences exploring your life while walking it. And at the end of every day be proud of yourself. Turn around, see what you have learned and know that you have already reached again a destination. There are no errors in it. They are only development moments.

Not only does it make your life much more colorful, it makes you a more colorful and broader-oriented person.

And, knowing your parents really want you to have a good future, don’t you think seeing a sustainable happy son or daughter makes them happy and thankful? And yes, maybe this needs some time.

Good trip insured (not even insurance required). You'll get there! True? Yes, that is why you can regard this form of life as an expedition. Something that most people only temporarily dare to do during their holidays to ... relax, gain experiences, make new contacts, embark on an adventure. Isn't that a bit strange?

Turn your entire life (and study) into an expedition. Worrying about the right study choice or the right entry level isn't worth to be part of it for you. It's all about your happiness.

Gangey Gruma (Frans Captijn)

email: captijninsight@gmail.com 
Foto blog: http://franscaptijnhisworld.blogspot.com

Captijn Insight. Catalyst in developing tranquility & in-sight to get in a sustainable way real connection, purpose, pleasure and flow in life, love, family, business, career and work again.